In the mount of the Lord it shall be seen.

Monday, April 12, 2010

Dear Boss,

Farewell. Finally, from today onwards, we would not be able to walk the rest of the journey with you further. But The Lord is with you till forever. I know you'll be enjoying your new gadgets and instruments, and carry on your passion for music.

Thank you Lord for giving me the precious time I had with dearest Dr. Kwek, for he truly, had lived his life, pouring out to others. In him, I see how serving The Lord is his life, and I have learnt alot from him. Thank God for letting me work in his clinic, despite I am the newest addition, he touched my life as much as he did for everyone else. I thank God for letting me chance upon this advertisement on Strait's Times one Saturday morning, and thank you Faith, for offering me the position. My life was changed ever since.

Thank you Boss, once again, for washing my ears, for it is something not many doctors would like to do. Furthermore I know you weren't feeling well that day. Thank you for restoring my hearing, thank you for your love and care for me, as well as every patient you had. Thank you for all your selflessness in helping the patients.

We love you, and you will be cherished by all of us.

Goodbye Boss. Till we meet again.

- Psalms 37:4 -
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. # ;

Dear Boss,

I've known even more about you today. I'm so afraid that I may forget this in future I must write it down. For I really respect you, I want to remember all the good things you have done. Although they may not be really great things, but they are done with great love.

Like how you always speak up for, and support your staff even if we are wrong, like when I was new, I gave the wrong queue, but you still supported me and honour the queue, even though you had your plans on how you wanted to clear the patients. Boss, you protected your staff, you went out of your way to do it, when you really didn't have to. You helped BL reasoned out with the watch technician when they tried to made her pay for their mistake. You love your people. You sent us home. You gave us pocket money. You bought us food, not only when we were hungry. You loved us so much. I really appreciate everything you have done for us.

You loved your patients. Even in the midnight, with just a call, you'll be right over for them. Be it for illness, or electrical problems, or water pipe problems, you could do everything. Just a call and you'll be right over. You were always first to arrive in church for your duty, you set up everything without others knowing. You were passionate in music, you bought a grand piano for the church, the best grand piano.

You know I was entering Pharmacy School, you allowed me to observe you perform operations. You taught me so much about different medication combinations and how they could be used in other ways. You cleaned my ears when I couldn't hear. You gave me medicine when I couldn't breathe. You were concerned abou us, in every aspect of our life. You gave us vaccination, every time a new batch of vaccine came. Thank you Boss, I don't know how I could express for gratitude towards your kindness, your love and your care. I only hope that in one way or another, I could be of help to your family you left behind.

You love your family so much. You change all the light bulbs even when you were ill. For you were afraid if you are gone, no one would change the bulbs and you want your children to be able to study in well lilted places. You showed your love in ways that were not seen by others. I'm truly touched by your spirit of giving and sharing your love to every one in your life. All the small little things done with great love and care. I'm sure God will reward you, and he will be with you.

Dear Boss, we would not be able to be with you for the rest of the journey after tomorrow. You are my most respected Boss, Rest In Peace. You will always be remembered by the staff of Evangel. You spirit of giving will be cherished among the residents.

- Psalms 37:4 -
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. # ;

Friday, April 9, 2010

Dear Boss,

May you Rest In Peace. With faith, I know that you have been healed and shall have no more pain and sufferings. And that you'll be dwelling in God's House forevermore. Again, with faith, I know that when the day comes, we would meet once again.

My deepest regret was not being able to be by your side, when you breathed your last. I know it has been a hard time and Boss, you have been really strong till the last moment. There was so much I wanted to tell you. But I know now, you've heard them all. Be assured, that Faith and the children, will be taken care of.

Dear Boss, I will study hard, as you have always wanted me to, and I will learn diligently, I will carry on your spirit of giving and healing, as best as I can. Dear boss, you will be dearly missed. For you, your favourite,

Psalm 23

The Lord is my Shepherd I shall not want
He maketh me to lie down in the green pastures
He leadeth me beside the still waters
He restoreth my soul
He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for His name's sake
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I will fear no evil
For thou art with me
Thy rod and thy staff they comfort me
Thou preparest before me, in the presence of mine enemies
Thou annointest my headwith oil
My cup runneth over
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life
And I will dwell in the house of The Lord forever.

In loving memories, the best Boss: Dr Kwek Soon Kiat Eric.

- Psalms 37:4 -
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. # ;

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Tribute to my Dearest, and most respected Boss.

Boss has passed away on 8 April 2010, 8.24pm. I wished I could be at his side. The only regret I had was not being able to see his last, and tell him how much I respected and loved him.

Rest In Peace. The girls will be of help to your family in any way we could. We would be strong, and continue your legacy. Rest assured I'll work hard, study hard, and do as well as I can, and be a responsible and good pharmacist in future.

Dear Boss, rest peacefully. You will be missed by the patients, the girls and I. We love you.

- Psalms 37:4 -
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. # ;

Sunday, April 4, 2010

Do you have faith? Could someone spare me some faith?

I really tired. Be it physically, mentally or emotionally.

Physically- work and traffic duties are killing me. I'm feeling feverish since Thursday. The weather is making it worse. My sleep is notorious for its quality and quantity. I wanna exercise. I feel unhealthy.

Mentally- assignment 3 is quite a kill. Thinking about my time management is super kill. Thinking about how to sort out my new work matter is mega kill. What's more exams' round the corner, how am I gonna start? Or concentrate? With so many thoughts occurring in my mind.

Emotionally- letting go is hard. Letting go of all old things/people/environment that just clicked with you so well, is really really tough. As much as I would like to be open minded as receptive, I'm concerned about what lies ahead of me. Am I getting my priorities correct?

I thought I just felt extremely positive, optimistic and upbeat just Friday midnight, what have I done to my mood now?!

Suddenly everything that went so well, just all turned so rancid. I don't wanna deal with them. I'm tired of dealing with problems, trying my best to come up with the best resolution every time, then I'll see the same problem again the day after. Am I wrong? Have I been handling things in the wrong way?

B:
The more I tried to love you for the way you are, the more I ask myself why am I still doing this? I thought that by doing that I would remove disagreements, expectations and resentment. I don't feel happy at all trying to do this all day, I feel like I've been postponing my happiness, and trying to achieve something that has no end to it. I'm tired. Really tired. I'm trying to explain to you my feelings all day, you telling me you got it, understood, and 2 hours later the whole cycle just repeats itself.

I looked back, and realised I've been trying to do this for almost 5 whole years. With also an attempt to let you know how I was thinking, turning into trying to "improve" you attempt, which failed. I seriously wished I could just let everything go, let me just accept things as whatever they are, but it still seems like even after then, I still won't be happy. And your indifference is not helping.

I hope I'm not too greedy.
I'm asking for you to be able to listen to what I'm saying, as least in a 90% attentive way.
I'm asking for you to tell the truth like, eg. just admit that you're tired when you're tired.
I'm asking for you to have some awareness of the changes your mood.
I'm asking for you to just give a little thought before you speak as words from loved ones can be really hurtful.

I don't know.
But will you be bothered?
Can you be bothered?
Are you understanding what's written here.
Can you feel my emotions?
Am I supposed to still believe in your promises
when I see the exact opposing happening with my eyes?

I don't know.
Tell me what to do.
I can't hold there any longer
I'm tired of making this blog such a sad place.
I'm tired of being positive and optimistic.
And the Will to want to be happy isn't helpful.
I'm tired of living,
tonight I sleep and I may not open my eyes again. (I'll be happy if this happens but sadly it's almost always not the case.)

Tell me how to go on loving you.

- Psalms 37:4 -
Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. # ;